5 Tower District Businesses That Are Probably Laundering Drug Money

by The Editor

Hearken back, if you will, to Season 3 of Breaking Bad. Our hero (or anti-hero) Walter White is looking to find a way to turn the income he earns manufacturing Crystal Meth into taxable income by funneling it through a legitimate business. This is necessary, by the way, so that the feds can't crack down on him for tax evasion, which is a great way to send someone to jail if you can't pin anything else on them. Anyways, his esteemed lawyer, Saul Goodman (née James McGill), takes him to a local establishment called Lazer Base and tells him the owner will "look the other way to keep his dream afloat".

And you gotta wonder, "How often does that happen in Fresno?"



Before we begin I'm gonna come right out and say that we are not accusing any of these businesses of laundering drug money. I just question how some of these places can stay open. I mean, if places that people actually go to close down, then how come these places have been around so long? It's fishy.

Tower Clock Shop

Watch and clock repair? Besides being a completely unnecessary service, they're not even any good at it. That clock at the top of their sign doesn't even work! Really!

Clock Specialty

Two clock stores in one neighborhood when, let's be honest, one is way too many? Who do you think you're kidding?

The Brass Unicorn

You mean to tell me that these guys can afford to have not one but two shop fronts by selling incense sticks and charging people to have their crystals read? NOT BUYING IT!

In their defense, they're probably only laundering money from psychedelics which is not the same as laundering money from heroin or meth.

The Dragon's Treasure

Is there really that big of a market for fantasy themed jewelry in Fresno? You tell me.

Blimpie Subs

(not pictured)

Next to "homemade", sub sandwiches are the second worst form of sandwich. And everyone in Tower's always like, "It needs to be local!" 

Plus, someone had to launder that money once The Game Preserve closed down. And we all know The Game Preserve was the original Tower business that was probably laundering drug money.

Would you add anything to our list? Let us know in the comments.